Summary
Set in the near future, during a riot in LA, a “members only” hospital caters to criminals and lowlifes. What could go wrong?
My Thoughts
This film reminded me a lot of another film I’d seen recently: “Upgrade”. While “Upgrade” is being praised as exhilarating and shocking, this film is flying under the radar. It’s too bad. This, while it is far from a masterpiece, is far more original than “Upgrade”. It has better acting, a unique premise, and a cool world that, if it had been handled correctly, could’ve spawned another cinematic universe. Sadly, there were too many characters (some of them, utterly superfluous), some stupid choices, too many unexplained coincidences, and, honestly, a somewhat flat finale. I’ve seen a few whiners online saying this is a rip-off of “John Wick” (2014), but other than the fact that both films have secret criminal societies, there are hardly any other similarities. I saw this film yesterday, and I struggled with whether or not to give this film a 3.5 or a 3… if you read my Upgrade review, you’ll remember that I ended up going with a 3 because the film felt like a blender of a ton of better films. This film I went with a 3.5 because this film has more original concepts and interesting characters.
(SOME SPOILERS IN THE FOLLOWING PARAGRAPH)
Usually at this point in my review I’d try to explain the general plot, but this is an ensemble piece, one with various storylines that all intersect at Hotel Artemis. Pretty much all you need to know is that a bunch of injured people with dark backstories show up at Hotel Artemis during a riot and violence ensues. Jodie Foster (“Taxi Driver”) is a Nurse and Dave Bautista (“Blade Runner 2049”) is her assistant/muscle; Sterling K Brown (“The Predator”) is a criminal who tried to get out of the game, but kept getting sucked in by his brother, played by Brian Tyree Henry (“Widows”); Sofia Boutella (“The Mummy”) is a world class assassin; Charlie Day (“Pacific Rim: Uprising”) is a weapons dealer; Jeff Goldblum (“Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom”) is the mob lord of LA, and Zachary Quinto (“Star Trek”) is his whiney rich-kid son; and Jenny Slate (“Venom”) is a cop and a completely unnecessary character.
(SPOILERS END)
Things I Liked…
World-building. The world that they built here was original-ish and fresh. It had the grungy worn out feeling of “Blade Runner”, but it didn’t take it so far as to set it thirty years in future, where tech is a whole new character by itself. This movie takes place in 2028; there are a few tech advancements (laser scalpels, diamond vaults concealed in pens, talking coffee pots), but for the most part, the world feels sort of retro. I liked the color scheme; the golden-brownish feel of everything. It made things feel dirty and lived in. The hotel itself was cool, too, and the concept of an on-call hospital for criminals is interesting. There is a deeper world beneath the surface here; I love films that only imply the world that is bigger- ones that don’t parade it in front of your face and beg you to love it.
Character backstories. None of the characters have a ton of screen time (other than Foster, who works as the thread that weaves this together), but all of the characters have at least some sort of backstory and a little bit of an arc, and some of them are truly interesting characters. Sterling K Brown and Jodie Foster are the show-stealers here. I haven’t seen Foster since 2013’s “Elysium”, which was disappointing at best. Seeing her onscreen again made me so happy; the little quirks and nervous ticks she gave the Nurse made her stand out far from the other actors in this film (particularly the way she walked). Jeff Goldblum, though he wasn’t given a ton of screen time, was actually pretty great (he’s essentially a quirky caricature of himself at this point, but that always works for me). Sofia Boutella actually stands out too- I remember her primarily from the God-awful Mummy remake, and I thought that would kill her career. She’s not going to win any awards anytime soon, but at least she’s got some acting chops.
Writing. There was also some clever writing in this film; clever lines, clever catch phrases. But there was also some not so good writing. It felt sort of uneven, but there were certainly some lines that I’ll remember. (“They paid for your death, don’t give them your dignity for free.” “So this is how it ends… send me down the river, baby.”)
Things I Didn't Liked
Coincidence? I think so…
There are far too many coincidences in this movie, some of which have no real bearing on the plot. Why do Sterling K Brown and Sofia Boutella have to know each other? Why does the one cop that knew Jodie Foster’s son show up at the Hotel on this night? Why does Sofia Boutella’s mark come to this hospital when it’s mentioned that there are other hospitals closer? How did Jeff Goldblum get injured on this night if he was out of LA? Who knows? The movie doesn’t expand on these details.
Plot Holes…
This is supposed to be a secret hospital; then why does Dave Bautista go up to the roof to fix the freaking giant GLOWING NEON SIGN that proclaims this is Hotel Artemis? If characters are robbing a bank and they’re wearing masks, why do they keep taking the masks off to talk to each other? Doesn’t that completely negate the point of a mask? (There are other holes too, but I’m trying not to give away too much of the plot.)
Unnecessary Characters…
Charlie Day was unneeded in this film. He was there simply to give characters a reason to talk about their backstories. The same thing goes for Jenny Slate. Her character, a cop, is brought into the hospital simply so that Jodie Foster could unload her backstory in an expositional dump. She was literally the most pointless character in the world; there had to have been a better way to get that story out there.
Zachary Quinto…
Ughhhhhhhhhh. Zachary needs to stop overacting. He’s whiney and annoying in this film, and what’s worse, he’s one of the big bad guys. He’s so terrible that I cringed every time he was on screen. He was worse than a high school theater performer; screaming whenever he was supposed to be angry, and talking harshly and with heaping mounds of bravado whenever he wasn’t screaming. I honestly felt embarrassed when I watched him. Sorry, Zach. I liked you in “Star Trek” and “American Horror Story Season One”, but this was really rough.
Verdict:
There are some cool things in this film, and if it were executed a different way, it could’ve been awesome. If you’ve followed my reviews for this website at all, you’ll know that I have a soft spot for fantasy films and some sci-fi stuff, so by and large, I enjoyed my hour and a half at “Hotel Artemis”. It was almost enough fun for me to add it to my guilty pleasure list, but not quite. In the end, the choice is yours… see this movie if you want, don’t see it and you wont be missing much.
I miss Jodie Foster. I wish she would do more.
Review Written By: